Need to Feel Closer to God? Start writing....
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Writing from your heart -
If you're like me, you let everyday life get so hectic and you feel guilty that you don't and haven't spent enough time with God. I'm a Christian and sometimes I think a poor excuse for one. I mumble and groan about how hard my life is and yet I don't take the time to sit down for even a half hour to be alone with My Savior. I know it must hurt Him that I can't or don't want to bother getting up early to pray or meditate. I go astray...fall away.... distance myself from Him, not intentionally, but one day blends into another and the next thing I know, I realize I haven't really prayed or talked to Him in a while. I feel guilty so that tends to keep me away even longer.
A while back I started a journal, a big, fat notebook I called Dear God. I started out enthusiastically and filled several pages day after day, then it was once a week, ok, once every couple weeks. Now, sadly, I'm ashamed to say I've gone a couple months without making an entry.
In my letters to God I start out simply, Dear Lord or Dear God....... then I pour out my heart to Him. At first I start writing out of guilt......obligation.....then the more I write, stuff starts coming out of my mind and heart that I didn't plan on writing but I promised God when I started the journal I would be completely honest even if I were mad at myself, someone else or HIM. I would be completely honest because He already knows my heart anyway. Who do I think I'm kidding? I learn things about myself. How much I really do love God and Jesus and what He did for me and you and everyone He created. I go from complaining about my life to worshipping Him right there on the page!
I can't explain how that makes me feel when I reach that point of surrender and peace.....I see myself for the sinner I really am and realize again and again after every entry how much I need Him and appreciate Him for his blessings and for listening.
Let me tell you something. I've felt His presence a few times when I needed Him. One time was when my mother died. He gave me strength and peace and when I cried He cried. I recently had to undergo a painful neurological test called an EMG. There are two parts to it. One part is the nerve conduction test in which they deliver shockwaves through your nerves and the other was the muscle test where they insert needles into your muscles, move the needle around a bit or ask you to move that muscle which makes it excruciating. I held up with tensing myself up and clenching my jaw. I hardly made a whimper unless it was very painful but held up. I could feel God's presense holding me up and giving me strength. But let me tell you as soon as I went out to car, sat down, shut the door, I cried like a baby, I wept for about five minutes because the built up tension was too much. I kept saying, God that hurt, God that hurt so much. As I was crying, I could sense that He too was crying with me. I knew He was watching His child hurting and He hurt too. God is everywhere helping everyone at once but on a personal level that makes you feel like He stopped the world to comfort you. How wonderful He is!
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Thanks so much for your story. I felt really touched!!
Takes journeling to a whole new level.
I recently lost my grandmother and feel lossed. I was upset at God for taking my grandmother from me because I prayed so hard the night that she died. Before that I myself used to have a Dear God journal that I wrote in everyday! But I havent in about 2 or 3 moths and I would tell myself nd God that I would write again but I never did! I Go to CHURCH weekly and I believe and love God immensely. I have been listening to the Gospel cahnnel all this week and trying to come to terms with my grandmother's passing because it has been extremely rough! I was mad at God at the beginning but I have prayedand apologized, I just haven't wrote in my Dear God Book in a long time which I am not proud of!I wold always start by saying Thank You to him and telling him how great he was! I did feel a connection to God! And while I am still searching during this difficult time I have turned on Gospel music but I just don;'t feel close to him like I did and I long for that day when Im happy again, and have his love over me! I wish that I could be close to him again, I just don't know how! If anyone could help give me insight on how to be more closer to God I would greatly be Blessed!
This is a very beautiful story. I love how you allowed yourself to feel his presence. I will never forget the first time I finally let God hug me. Its amazing that he can be hugging me, weeping with the woman about her grandmother, and comforting you at the exact same time yet I felt all of his attention was only on me at that moment. Wow we serve an amazing God!
I'm fairly new to Christianity, although I grew up in a religous family and attended church regularly, but I have recently spent the time to get to know God and actually read the Bible and God has finally allowed the eyes to see and the ears to hear .I love your story and wish you nothing but the best and a continued deep and loving relationship with God.
thank you so much for that entry...it brought me to tears...It made me realize I am not the only one struggling with my christianity...it made me remember only a few months ago i cried and screamed out to go about my financial issues and how i had no money at all to pay my bills...and how it was eating me alive..and how i had no idea how i was going to make it...I HEARD HIS VOICE IN MY HEART...and he said to me "I am here"..while i was praying..(he does that everytime i talk to him) and in two days i had unemployment to pay my bills...What Im trying to say is that, as christians we belong to him forever...he is forever our father, our dad...and we need to try to put him on the top of this list everyday...and ask for forgiveness when we do...he tells out heart to make another beat...lets together start giving back the love and care that he freely gives us..be blessed sweetie
Thanks for this. I write in my journal but I only wrote lists of things I needed. I don't think I even prayed for other people in it...just me me me. I think I'm beginning to see what's keeping me from God. Thanks!!!!
Gosh! this brought me to tears.. i gues i felt a sharp stab of guilt deep inside...
Thank you for this I am trying to grow closer to God I have been for a while now and I randomly just now woke up at about 4:30 turned on my phones internet and searched wanting to grow closer to God. This made me cry reading this and all of your comments. I don't understand I feel guilty but idk if that's why I cried. Anyways I will try this I want nothing more than to have a strong relationship with our savior and I love writing this helped allot.
I absolutely loved this and it rily made me reflect on ma life.Of late av been so disconnected from God and im confused about so many things.I rily need God to just help me and direct me every step of the way.At this point al try anything to be able to feel God's presence in ma lyf again including starting a journal.op it works 4 me.
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autumn 3 years ago
Thanks so much for this insight. I've been trying to connect with God a lot more lately. And I love to write in my journal, but never thought to write to God. I am going to try this!